If I ever have children (and the possibility seems to be becoming increasingly remote), I will ensure that they break whatever new rules the British government is developing to stop them taking packed lunches into school.

While the Education Secretary's mates, Henry Dimbleby and John Vincent, co-founders of the Leon restaurant chain have clarified that they don't want to 'ban' packed lunches, they have stated their insistence on them being phased out (presumably by government - therefore tantamount to a ban).

Despite their circumlocution in this area, there is no doubt to my mind that whether I choose to send my kids to school with a bucket of quinoa, as they might prefer, or a bucket of KFC is entirely up to me and my not-yet-existent children.

I do recall a time when the Conservative party was promoting itself, pre-election, using these posters which read, "Big Government = Big Problems". I'm sure this definition hasn't changed - so perhaps wanting to put an end to Britain's problems has simply found its way out of the government's policy book, to be replaced with celebrity chefs and headlines to please MumsNet types.

Frankly, it is none of the government's business to provide food for my children. It should of course concentrate on what schools are there for - education, not nutrition. And anyway, I've been to Leon, and I'm not sure any teenager wants to revel in a 'Magic Mackerel' salad for lunch.

I suppose they could always go for the brocolli, alfalfa, quinoa and toasted seed variant, eh? Give me a break.