The Guardian praises The Guardian

Polly Toynbee's latest self-aggrandising tirade in the Guardian speaks highly of... The Guardian

by on 29 March 2013 14:51

Accordingly to Polly Toynbee - I know, that's the worst way to start an article - this Monday signals the most important moment in the history of the coalition government.

Got that? Forget the lives saved by the Libya intervention. Forget the massive incursions into free speech by the Leveson inquiry. Forget Scotland and the Union, the EU referendum, the education reforms and the attempts to pay down our national deficit that could cripple the country for our sons and daughters. FORGET IT ALL.

No, Monday is what's important, because that's the day a lot of the government's welfare reforms come into play. You know those nasty reforms that stop council-house tenants and those reliant on benefits from having more comfortable lifestyles as those of us who are trying to earn a middle-income salary. Those nasty reforms.

But it wasn't so much her wilful ignorance and deception on the issue, or the lack of a broader worldview that amused me so much about Toynbee's tirade. No. It was the amazing way in which she managed to congratulate herself and her colleagues at the Guardian, all the while both patronising the reader, and I imagine, keeping a straight face. Read, with my emphasis added:

"So far, public opinion seems alarmingly content with these cuts – but before we despair of human kindness, many can plead ignorance. The government relies on destitution staying silent and unseen, isolated in families with no collective voice. Dear Guardian reader, you know what's happening because we report on the social security calamity almost daily, as you would expect."

Translation: "Dear Guardian reader (the one of you?), you know what the latest Left-wing spin is because the Guardian doesn't stop carping on about it, almost daily."

Oh Polly, you can do better than this, can't you?

Can you not show the slightest amount of humility in your writing? Do you miss the high-praise you used to receive before people realised you were full of it so much that you have descended into self-flattery, commenting on your own munificence and magnanimity?

Hilariously, Toynbee even manages to inadvertantly slip in how irrelevant her newspaper is, claiming that despite her outrage, no one seems to know, or care about the impending "cuts". She writes:

 "People should know that historians will record the earthquake of social destruction that happened in their name, while they read of nothing but "scroungers" and the "soaring benefit bill"."

Perhaps, Polly, no one knows about your perspective on these matters because for the past decade, your paper has become an increasingly vitriolic and fringe voice in both the media sphere, and in the minds of the public?

I mean, once upon a time when you said, "Dear Guardian reader', you would have been addressing nearly half a million people in print, would you not? How that's been going for you, lately?

P.S. Polly, keep doing what you're doing. It only causes more people to donate to us!

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